St Margaret, Queen of Scots

She was also a pioneer in another sphere. Bands of women met together at her invitation to study, discuss the Scriptures, and embroider vestments and altar cloths for the churches. So we can call Margaret the inventor of the Women's Club.

[Phyllis McGinley, Saint-Watching]

A long tall cool drink of ...

Southern Girl's Frozen Fruit ring.

"And yes, I did get out my Bundt pan and make the well behaved southern girl’s ubiquitous frozen fruit ring for the Family Friendly non-sangria punch. Because I was Raised Right. And have hosted umpty thousand showers. "

Check out the beautiful picture and read Joshilyn's trials and travails of catering her own book launch with delicate, feminine food. Tres Church Lady.

A Church Lady Must-Read

If you've never read Alice von Hildbrand's book By Love Refined, you simply must. That's all there is to it. It's subtitled "Letters to a young bride," but don't let that stop you even if you can't consider yourself one of those. I first read it a couple years ago, and make it a habit to reread every six months or so. When my roommate recently asked me if I could recommend a good relationship book, I didn't hesitate to lend her my copy. A couple days later, I walked into our room to find her reading sections aloud to her boyfriend. She says it totally changed her view on their relationship, and I've found the same to be true for me and mine.

Every chapter deals with a different aspect of relationships (married, dating, friendship, just plain interpersonal), with practical and down-to-earth advice. Von Hildebrand understands the strengths and weaknesses of women, and how this affects relationships. She's a master of integrating the unique - but certainly different - gifts of men and women, and turning what could be a weakness into a strength. One passage that particularly sticks out in my mind is from the chapter involving those those four "lovely" words that we all know we shouldn't say but somehow can't help thinking: "I told you so."

Alice could have been writing to me personally when she writes,

No doubt when Michael embarks on a hopeless enterprise or is about to make a serious blunder, you must warn him. But if he ignores your warning, you have to let him make his own mistakes. Once the error has been made, your theme changes radically: it's definitely not to stress how wise you were to foresee the catastrophe. It's rather to use your gifts to lessen the consequences of the mishap and help Michael not to lose face. (He should do the same for you when you're the wrong-headed one.)....

Objectively there's very little sense in ever saying "I told you so," because by the time you say it, the culprit knows it full well himself.

(emphasis mine)

I highly encourage you to move this to the top of your reading list. Read it all at once, a chapter or two a day, or just pick out the chapters that seem applicable (you certainly don't need to read them in order). At two pages each, a chapter is the perfect length for a quick reminder when you need it.

Black Friday, Frugal Holidays

Do not be conformed to this world
but be transformed by the renewal of your mind,
that you may prove what is the will of God,
what is good and acceptable and perfect. [Rm 12, 2]

Every year, Christmas merchandise comes out earlier and earlier. And no matter how much you try to resist the commercialism, to focus on Advent and the Nativity, it's hard to escape all the hype. As an alternative, some families I know have adopted the Hispanic tradition of exchanging gifts on the Epiphany (plus side: most things go on post-Christmas sales). I remain partial to my own family's tradition of reading from the Gospel of Matthew, Midnight Mass, followed by a family nativity play or caroling with a late supper; presents are opened the next morning.

The ideas below, culled from a variety of sources, tend more to an Advent-Nativity vision of Christmas. I am a strong proponent of store-bought Christmas purchases being completed before Advent begins. Then, in all these domestic preparations, there is more time to make our hearts ready to receive baby Jesus.

Some Frugal Holiday gift ideas, from Ravelry's Frugal Homemakers' Group
-Christmas Mason Jar Cookies (dry ingredients layered in jars)
-homemade cloth grocery bags, with a baked treat or snack inside
-homemade aprons
-homemade jam (see the Church Ladies' slow cooker apple butter & marmalade recipes)
-homemade vanilla
-homemade candy
-gift certificate to the grocery store
-Lavender sachets
-herbs in pots
-a ream of colored computer paper and a box of markers/crayons
-Festive Fivers (gifts for under 5 GBP)

Frugal Luxuries suggests
-Soup mixes in jars
-home-made epsom salt bath salts

Amy Dacyczyn of the Tightwad Gazette
-Hot cocoa mix
-A book of stamps & stationery
-A fruit stone wreath (spray painted gold or silver, then accentuated with evergreens)
-finishing a china pattern
-shoveling snow for an elderly family member or neighbor
-candlesticks & napkin rings made from hardware components

The Church Ladies would add:
-subscription to a newspaper or magazine
-donations to charity (Heifer is fun for kids)
-a small themed basket. To pick up all components affordably, this involves keeping your eyes open, but a few small gifts can come together nicely (A British mystery theme: Agatha Christie novel, PD James novel, box of tea, jar of lemon curd, warm socks or slippers for reading on a winter's night. For the armchair traveler: a book like Little Saint or On Pilgrimage, some coffee, a package of biscotti, and a vintage souvenir)
-Gift certificate to the local coffee shop
-supplies or tool for a hobby (may not be a surprise, but well received)
-the Priests' Christmas Basket can also be modified for almost anyone- throw in a DVD and some candy, and you have a stay at home date for a married couple

People, look East, the time is near
Of the crowning of the year.
Make your house as fair as you're able,
Trim the hearth, and set the table.
People, look east, and sing today:
Love, the Guest, is on the way.

Image source: Sant' Apollinare, Ravenna